Remember: "Y'all" is singular. "All y'all" is plural. "All y'all's" is plural possessive.
When approaching a four-way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires always has the right of way.
When sending your wife down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to ask her to bring back beer.
If you have to vacuum the bed, it's time to change the sheets.
While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this is a job that should be done in private using one's OWN truck keys.
Livestock is usually a poor choice for a wedding gift.
Never take a beer to a job interview or ask if they press charges
Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them.
Always say "Excuse me" after getting sick in someone else's car.
The socially refined never fish coins out of public toilets, especially if other people are around.